Silence: A Communication Tool?

When most people hear the word “silence,” they might not think of it in the context of communication. Most people might believe that the word “silence” is the absence of communication. Some might say that it is the absence of thinking, let alone sound. However, in the article, “Finding the ‘‘Sense of the Meeting’’: Decision Making Through Silence Among Quakers,” by Elizabeth Molina-Markham, a research study was conducted to find that in some cultures, silence means the exact opposite.

When reading this research article, I was fascinated by the fact that people actually made decisions by silence. In any staff meeting I have ever attended, silence was the last thing that helped make a decision. Instead, silence had taken a leave of absence and was replaced with heavy sighs and elongated facial expressions. When someone was unhappy with the decisions being made, everyone could sense, if not see, the disappointment or anger.

The idea that decisions could be made by silence is a foreign concept to many in corporate business. Thus, I understand why this practice is found in the quiet Quaker churches that dot the hillsides. There is a reverence in faith that is not found in offices. I also discovered that silence is not universally understood. “ These ethnographic works, among others, reveal that in some cultures silence plays a more prominent role and is in some contexts more valued than speech (C. Braithwaite, 1990; Carbaugh, Berry, & Nurmikari-Berry, 2006; Wieder & Pratt, 1990)” (Molina-Markham 157). Silence in our culture means we don’t know what to say next instead of reflecting on what has already been said.

Two types of silence were identified in this article; “1. The silence that frames the event and occurs in the opening and closing parts; and 2. The silence that occurs during the process of decision making when agenda items are being considered” (164). These were documented as having different characteristics. Assigning characteristics to something that is supposed to be nothing, yet as Molina-Markham learned, “...Acheson (2008) emphasized that understandings of silence differ cross-culturally, and variations in cross-cultural interpretations of silence are as likely to cause misunderstandings as differences in interpretations of speech” (157).

This article led me to question if we, in our culture, could form an understanding and appreciation for how powerful silence can be. Could we adopt the pause in between hearing what was said and immediately coming back with something? The model of communication does not have a thought bubble after the message is sent. The ellipsis is nowhere to be found that says we are carefully and quietly crafting a response. We are blasting our air horns, especially with those who disagree with us.

In conclusion, I believe that silence can be helpful in making decisions. There is a level of respect not only for their faith, but for each other. The research in this article proves more than the times silence was observed and why. It proves they recognize each voice, or in this case, no voice, and that each time words are spoken, they are of immeasurable value. The do not speak to hear themselves talk. The speak instead with their heads bowed and eyes closed, focusing on something greater than themselves. There is a lot we can learn from this practice, if only we stopped talking.

References

Molina-Markham, E. (2014). Finding the “Sense of the Meeting”: Decision Making Through Silence Among Quakers. Western Journal Of Communication, 78(2), 155-174. doi:10.1080/10570314.2013.809474